Go God Go

episode recap

The topic of evolution is introduced to the 4th graders of South Park Elementary and while their teacher is against the theory a change of mind has implications for the future. And speaking of the future, Cartman is trying to send himself there; to the exact date that the newest video game console, the Nintendo Wii is being released.

At the South Park Mall Cartman is outside EV Games, waiting for the new Nintendo Wii game system to come out. His mom wants him to be patient and he has another three weeks to wait for its official release. At South Park Elementary Mrs. Garrison tells Principal Victoria and Mr. Mackey that he is not going to teach his students evolution but they tell him that he must do it. He thinks it is bull crap but he teaches the theory of evolution in his only particular style. Later back at the mall, Cartman still awaits the arrival of the Wii. His mother gets him to come home, but he can’t sleep. Time is going much too slow for him. He decides to have himself frozen, so that time will go by much faster for him, but the boys at the bus stop won’t help him. At school some concerned devout Catholic parents are worried about the evolutionary lesson Mrs. Garrison is teaching her students, their daughter thinks she is a “retarded fish frog.” Since Mrs. Garrison doesn’t seem to want to do the job, she brings in brings in Richard Dawkins, a world renown evolutionary scientist, to teach the subject. He starts to teach the children about evolution, but get into opinionated discussion about the subject until Mrs. Garrison starts to act like a monkey in the classroom and throws poo at Dawkins. After a visit to the principal’s office, Dawkins tells Mrs. Garrison that he admires her passion and he invites her to dinner. Mrs. Garrison celebrates the fact that she is going to have her first real date since having her sex change operation.

At the Cartman home, his mother finds Eric hiding in the freezer. Not to be stopped Cartman gets Butters to accompany him up into the mountains where he is going to freeze himself. It will be up to Butters to come back and find him in three weeks and not before, in time for the launch of the Wii. At an Italian restaurant Mrs. Garrison’s date with Dawkins is going extremely well, but for Dawkins it would be perfect if she was an atheist. He tells her about the concept of the “flying spaghetti monster,” which convinces Ms. Garrison that she should become an atheist and their date ends with a bang. Meanwhile, up on the mountain, Cartman has managed to freeze himself, but an avalanche buries him and Cartman is woken to find out that he has been frozen in ice for over 500 years; he doesn’t care, he still wants to play the Nintendo Wii.
Evolution is now being successfully taught by Dawkins in the classroom, but when Stan makes a comment that would allow there to still be the possibility of God, Mrs. Garrison mocks him. Later in bed, Dawkins tells Mrs. Garrison that he didn’t think she should be so bold about the need for no religion. He’s never met a woman with such balls. Mrs. Garrison tells Dawkins that with his intellect and her balls they could create a world without religion. Professor Chaos and General Disarray are playing in the backyard, but when his mother asks him if he’s heard anything from Eric Cartman, Butters begins to worry; especially after General Disarray tells him that Cartman is probably dead now that he’s been frozen. The pair go up to the mountain, where they can’t find Cartman’s body and General Disarray tells him to forget he ever knew anything about it. Back to the future (2546), Cartman is delighted to find out that they may have found a Nintendo Wii for him to play, but first they want to ask him about events that happened around the time he was frozen. It was in that year that world’s need for religion changed. The whole world is now filled only by atheists. The group Cartman is with is known as the United Atheist League (UAL), but they come under attack from the United Atheist Alliance (UAA). The UAA beats the UAL and take Cartman prisoner. They send a message to the Allied Atheist Allegiance (AAA, comprised of sea otters) whom they are at war with. Since this is the dawn of the sea otter, they prepare to attack.


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