Death & dying

Working with hospice is tough enough without the entanglement of religion and family members who may or may not be helpful in the dying processes. I respect their work and the goals of Hospice; several family members and friends were helped, especially families. I have no idea how one bridges the gap when a person is dying, weary, perhaps sick, sometimes tormented by people who love them, and all the while knowing death is an end of life as we know it and a change to a different form of energy. I don't understand why that is so frightening; death is like going to sleep; the brain and other organs begin to shut down when blood flow stops. My children have instructions to hold my hand if they can be with me, and rejoice that I came into the world and found it to be just splendid.

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Death and dying from an atheist point of view

Discussion Forum

Resources for understanding hospice and the process of dying

Started by Hunter. Last reply by Joan Denoo yesterday. 2 Replies

Greetings, all,About a week ago, my mother began the process of dying and was put into in-home hospice care.  The care worker is very good, and the care being provided is excellent.  Unfortunately,…Continue

The Comfort of an Atheist Afterlife

Started by annet. Last reply by annet Jun 14, 2012. 2 Replies

Today on Radio lab they did a really good hour on death and the afterlife.  Here is the link: pulled it…Continue


Started by dr kellie. Last reply by dr kellie May 10, 2012. 14 Replies

I am about to pick out my gravestone.  I need to come up with something I want written on it.  I have some ideas... This isn't meant to be a discussion about whether or not to be buried or have a…Continue

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Comment by Joan Denoo on May 7, 2012 at 2:45pm

booklover, A very sad day, indeed. So very young. I just got goosebumps wondering how their parents handle their losses. In such cases it is hard to be casual (not the right word). For old ladies such as I, it is business as usual: be born, live and die. Not so with these young people. 
Perhaps the only comfort is having had them for 20 years and not forgetting them. It doesn't help the sad. 
I'm glad your daughter has you to talk about it. 

Comment by Joan Denoo on May 7, 2012 at 3:04am

Hi Chris, glad to have you join this group. When my grandmother died, there was not a diagnosis for her behavior, which was clearly what we now call Alzheimer's. We didn't treat her very well when she did strange things. Thankfully, we know more about the aging brain and the stresses that go along with it. Those years of decline, whether with full mental and physical capacity or not, can be dealt with more humanely than some have done in the past. Growing older with dignity and self-respect is a learned behavior, and we should be able to learn from each other. 

Comment by Plinius on May 7, 2012 at 1:29am

Thanks for the invitation Joan! I haven´t got many ideas how to bridge the gap when someone is dying. I was there when my parents-in-law died and at the moment I often visit an aunt who is sliding away into Alzheimer's - what else can we do than make the dying person feel secure and loved? It's the best I can give.

Comment by Joan Denoo on May 7, 2012 at 12:33am

Be sure to watch this video of a man talking about death and dying from an atheist perspective.

Comment by Steph S. on May 7, 2012 at 12:32am
What a sweet kitty picture!
Thank you Joan! Group hug!
Comment by Joan Denoo on May 6, 2012 at 10:24pm

You are all just awesome! I am so lucky to have each one of you as a friend.  

Comment by Steph S. on May 6, 2012 at 8:26pm
Thank you so much Melinda! I'm glad you are on the Nexus too. You made my day!
Comment by Steph S. on May 6, 2012 at 7:56pm
Joan and Melinda you have such wonderful words of wisdom. I love reading your posts here. Wonderful group Joan!
Comment by annet on May 6, 2012 at 7:29pm

I agree Booklover, that is beautiful Joan. What a gift you've given them with those words.

My 86 yr old mom lives with us. She is in good physical shape but this subject certainly is on one's mind more in such a situation.  


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