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The portrait is Charles Darwin, age 31, in 1840

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Comment by Robert Lanktree on June 8, 2016 at 11:19am

Dominic, I am appalled at how people treat animals (not related I know but it's still a trait humans should be embarrassed of) and each other. The punishments and general values of some countries is just so 14th century I cannot rationalize it. We have had a VERY long time to get our act together collectively yet the vast majority still demonstrate more animal behaviour than human at times. Follow my train of thought Dominic? 

Comment by Grinning Cat on June 8, 2016 at 11:14am

We certainly don't all fit into nice neat categories! I've heard of people finding themselves having sexual chemistry with one particular woman, or one particular man, and they feel nothing like that with other people of that gender. For some others, gender simply isn't a big factor in who they're attracted to. Some people find that they need to be deeply emotionally connected with someone before they feel sexual attraction. And as you said, some just don't feel the desire for sex with other people.

Comment by Raven Burnes on June 8, 2016 at 11:06am

I do actually know someone who wasn't sure whom he was attracted to - males or females for a long time. He hadn't had a girlfriend and he was in his 20's. He went to a strip club and felt nothing for the women there. So he thought maybe he was gay. But he hung out with guys and felt nothing for them either. Eventually we met and he was really attracted to me. I was his first sex and he was definitely straight. But he did need to "experiment" - i.e. do some self-exploration before he was sure. Most people know instinctively, but I do think some people don't have strong sexual feelings until later in life or until they fall in love. And some people just aren't that sexual period.

Comment by Robert Lanktree on June 8, 2016 at 8:25am

I'm so sorry but after reading some of this thread...I thought we were supposedly the top species on this planet. I cannot believe what some humans (well, I think they are....) are capable of.

Comment by Susan Stanko on June 8, 2016 at 7:41am

Joseph, he might be thinking of bisexuals.  Even thought they are bi they usually prefer one sex to the other.

Comment by Joseph P on June 8, 2016 at 6:15am

Wow, I knew that Uganda and a few others were pretty bad.  I thought Nigeria was a little more reasonable than that.  Sheesh.

Comment by Jennifer W on June 8, 2016 at 6:00am
That's pretty surreal Dominic! Could you get less jail time for murder?
Comment by Joseph P on June 7, 2016 at 7:00pm

Never met a gay person.  Wow.  I imagine that they're still pretty far in the closet, in Nigeria, huh?  So, you've probably met one, but he/she had to pretend to not be gay.  That happens a lot, in the more socially-conservative countries and social groups.

Ah, I think I see what you might have meant, a few comments back, when you talked about hearing that stuff on the radio.  You're thinking of ... I dunno, bi-curious, maybe?

I imagine that most gay people know that they're gay, starting around puberty.  However, I guess there could be some kids in societies that are so homophobic that it might not even occur to the poor kid that he's gay.  He's just been pushed towards women so hard that he never even considered the alternative.

Definitely, some people who are bisexual might not realize that, if not presented with the concept.  I think that most of them could figure it out by just thinking about it a lot, though.

What's funny and kind of sad is what you hear from some of the most extreme anti-gay preachers.  They'll talk about how their god doesn't want us to go that way, no matter how much we feel the temptation.

Nah preacher-man, stop projecting your issues onto me.  I feel no such temptation.  That's just you being gay or bisexual, and you should go and have sex with men, if you feel that urge, assuming you aren't bisexual, in a marriage with a woman who wouldn't approve of you sleeping with men.

Comment by Joseph P on June 7, 2016 at 1:34pm

Sounds like platonic love to me.  I'm not sure what you're getting at here.

Comment by Plinius on June 7, 2016 at 1:20pm

On the other side... you fall in love with a person, not counting his or her sex. So I can only say that I've lived like a hetero for many years now, but I don't know what happens the next time. And that's all right with me.




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