An eight year old Catholic boy desperately wants a bicycle, so he goes and asks his Mom. She’s busy with the other 6 children, and tells him to ask his Dad. His Dad, working on the car in the garage, tells him to ask Santa for one. “But Dad,” the boy protests, “it’s May and I want one for the summer.” His Dad shoots back, “Then ask Jesus.”
The boy thinks about it, and decides that’s a good idea. Jesus is more powerful than Santa and works all year long. So, he goes to his room and starts to write, “Dear Jesus, I am a very good boy…” and realizing he has done a few naughty things, and Jesus is the one entity you don’t lie to, tears up the paper and starts over. “Dear Jesus, I have been pretty good…” Tears that one up to. By the time he gets to “Dear Jesus, I hope to one day be a good boy…” he knows he’s screwed. He runs out of the house, crying with the realization he’ll never get that bike.
About a block down the street, he sees an inverted bath tub in a front yard with a statue of the Virgin Mary in it. He makes sure no one is looking, runs over, and grabs the statue. He runs straight back to his house, goes in the back door, runs up the stairs to his room, locks the door, and puts the statue under the bed. He takes out his notepad and pencil and starts writing again.
"Dear Jesus, If you ever want to see your mother again…..”
Sep 7, 2012
Sep 9, 2012
Hmmmm....Asbestos Mormon underwear???
Sep 10, 2012
Sep 11, 2012
A parody of "One Day More" from Les Miserables
Sep 16, 2012
If you guys have not heard of it, http://www.youtube.com/user/TheBibleReloaded this is a really good set of atheists reading the bible with commentary.
Sep 17, 2012
Talking about godless humour, who is going to watch our man John Stewart take on the ever-lovin' crazyman Bill "Bash 'em atheists" O'Reilly ?.
I love John very much, it is very much like infatuation. =]
Sep 18, 2012
The Stewart/O'reilly debate will be Oct. 6. Not sure of the time but I'm sure we' ll know by then.
Wrote a bit about how Star Wars is helping the GOP angry white guy deficit.
Sep 19, 2012
UPDATE: The Stewart/O'reilly debate will be on Oct 6th at 8pm (eastern) It will be online but they are charging $4.95 to see it with the money being split between two charities of Stewart and O'reilly's chosing.
Sep 21, 2012
Ok - really really mean and I typically don't advocate this sort of thing, but it's been a bad week for me...
Patricia, totally unexpected responses from pope and rabbi. Funny!
These guys have a healthy attitude to life. They laugh at every single aspect of it, and while religon is such an easy target and so they fire away at it a lot, even science doesn't miss out.
Some of their cartoons have cartoon nudity so marginally nsfw. Of course, most of you Cousin Johnathans can't come here at work anyway, in case the boss people with the invisible friend catch you! lol.
Sep 22, 2012
Sep 24, 2012
A thought concerning International Blasphemy Day.
Sep 26, 2012
Patricia, that chemistry student is going to go far in this world. What a sense of humor!
Sep 27, 2012
Loved it, Patricia - thanks for sharing. But I wonder, too good to be true? It could be a hoax written by a prominent atheist chemist. I'm sure there are plenty of those.
Sep 30, 2012
sk8eycat, funny! Thanks, I like a good cheery night refresher. I can go to sleep laughing.
Oct 3, 2012
At the doctor's office.
Oct 5, 2012
David - I noticed the writing just above the picture. "Most dinosaurs had small brains in comparison to the size of their bodies." The same is true of those that believe this crap.
I'd pray to that god. At least something positive would come out of it.
rockytij, this billboard reveals perfectly what is wrong with religion. Take someone as he/she is and change them into something other ... a zombie! This is the first time the word "zombie" made sense to me and I now understand its deepest meaning. It is not the developmental task to become what someone else desires of one, but to reveal who you are from the inside out.
Oct 6, 2012
What the hell is that billboard even supposed to mean? Is it the Mormon thing about God lightening your skin if you come follow him?
The Truthministry billboard is a spoof, I would think....since TruthMinistry claims to be able to "help people heal from homosexuality through the love of Jesus Christ"
(I'm thinking it's probably not "that" kind of love, though)
Ohhhhhhhh. I see it now, yeah. Mocking their inability to accept what every unbiased study has shown, that homosexuality is something intrinsic and not a choice. Damn, I'm slow tonight.
The fact that that sort of thing is explicitly in the Book of Moron helped along my confusion. I thought perhaps the Moron Church had decided against political correctness and was going back to their roots.
And I dunno, man. From what I hear, there's a lot of that kind of 'loving support' going on at those cure-the-gay ministries, too.
"...there's a lot of that kind of 'loving support' going on at those cure-the-gay ministries, too..."
AND individuals who call themselves psychologists.
Think, "Marcus Bachmann."
Selection of reading material offered to kids at the doc's office.
Just thought I'd share this. A brave van owner to be sure. Taken in Alabama. Not my van, of course.
Yeah, you have to be brave to paint a van that color.
OK, I still haven't figured out what the Boy Scout billboard is about. I know I am dense, but that one has me totally baffled.
Come to think about it, the Truth Ministry one still doesn't make any sense either. And who would be so red-neck to paint a van that awful shade of red and then put that license plate on it? Jeez, we need some hard-core anti-theists in society.
As to the dentist's reading material, boycott the dentist and with enthusiasm and vigor. Where are the Hitch's when we need them?
David, instead of boycotting the doctor's office, sneak some copies of Dan Barker's Just Pretend into the mix. It's s Freethought book for kids...telling thm that nobody can tell them what to think, that their minds are their own.
Oct 7, 2012
I recently wrote a bit about the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster getting into Presidential po....
sk8eycat, great idea! Free-thought from a dentists office, who would guess?!
Andrew, great site! "a majority of the beer swilling, smack talking members of the Captain's team want to make Mississippi go from Republican to marinara red just to prove a point." Cheers for marinara red!