"You don't have to stick your nose in someone's armpit to get a sense of what she smells like, assuming you haven't destroyed your sense of smell with cigarettes or something along those lines. Besides, we're talking about…"
"You walk up to people and sniff them? Really? OK.That's unusual, but so be it. Other humans are primarily visual, they react primarily to appearances.
Confidence and so on are fine things, but they are not what people screen on, to start with.…"
"More a matter of smell and feel, in my case. Speaking for everyone, as you're doing, will miss most of the people that you're trying to group together ... in this case, trying to generalize everyone. Besides, lots of women are…"
"Sadly, for the overwhelming majority of people, "chemistry" is simply a code word for "Are they hot?". Naturally, everyone denies this, but their actions contradict them. Women are just as guilty of this as men, if not more…"
"Having now spent several years immersed in the excruciating frustrations of online dating, my impression on "settling" has been colored by recent experience.
First, I need to soften my earlier stance (written now some 3 years ago!)…"
"The term "doomed" tickles my funny bone, as I've lately been reading about people who are called "singletons." They're people who are single by choice and dig it. I remarried after 30 - got divorced after 30 too. :-)"
"I think settling is the ability to will yourself to see a future against the odds. There are no guarantees. Sometimes people are not able to continue a relationship by the nature of their circumstances."
"I think it is *essential* not to "settle" on the must-haves or the dealbreakers. Some are structural: if one person is set on a big family (something I will editorially note that none of us should be set on in an overpopulated world) and…"
"Personally, I think for me it would be an issue for me to settle on the deal breakers. I'm not a person to quibble on minor issues however if you don't have all three qualifications then there could be a problem in the future. Even if I…"
"There is not settling and then there is removing yourself from any chance of finding companionship through unrealistic levels of restriction. I have physical and mental likes and then I have some repulsion towards some physical or mental…"
"We have a "can-do", "I can have anything that I want" culture that enjoins people to optimize. Optimize your career choice, your investment strategy, your hairstyle, your choice of mate - everything. This culture says…"
"I think it depends on what one means by "chemistry." Usually, I think of people's desire for "chemistry" as a desire for magic--as a desire for something that they take to be entirely beyond their control. It hits, and…"