Its been a hard day. Eleven years ago today my mother passed away. I was only ten, so every year its hard on me. I felt like I was robbed of so much.

It could have been harder, though. My best friend and my fiancee accompanied me to the gravesite. It was the first year I made it on her deathdate. It was nice to have their morale support. And they both knew better than to try to comfort me with the "She's in a better place" or "Everything happens for reason" (they are both religious, but still know better. :-)

I am also glad I didn't meet other family members there. They all went, but we all went at different times. They would have tried comforting me with the above statements, and today is not the day for that $hit, at least not today!

Then we went to visit my grandmother, I felt like she could use the support. It must be really hard to have to outlive your child. We kept her in good spirits. She hadn't seen my buddy since we were kids (my buddy's mom and my mom were best friends). That tickled her pink! lol

So it could have been worse. I'm glad I had my loved ones with me today.

Love. thats something even an atheist like me can believe in! :-)

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Comment by Rosemary LYNDALL WEMM on January 12, 2009 at 10:09am
You took a big step this year. The pain of losing someone close to you never goes away but it does get easier to live with. It passes into a kind of life wisdom. Look at it as a step towards intelligent emotional maturity.
Comment by Adam Johnson on January 12, 2009 at 4:54am
My dad died July 29, 1997. I feel you and I always get the same empty comments. I think that takes away from the deceased. I would rather think that his 33 years alive was dedicated to something worth living for (ie: raising his kids) instead of a stepping stone to some paradise. Makes me cherish the time we spent together was worth more.
Comment by michael williams on January 12, 2009 at 12:03am
References to old christian platitutes are like farting, sometimes they just happen. Even as an Alaydian, I sometimes catch myself saying, God only knows. Christianity is comforting. But so is Jack Daniels. Your family might try to comfort you by saying exactly the wrong thing. But its a kind of love. It does still hurt though, after all, the road to hell is paved with good intentions. The next time one of them gives you that old christian stuff, just perplex them with atheistic truth. They will most likely apologize.



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