A short play, in which John Smith has an audiance with God

A short play I wrote.

John Smith walks down the street, (he believes himself to be a "True Christian".) He steps of the curb and is hit by a bus, and knocked to kingdom come.

He feels a smug satisfaction wave over him as he floats to heaven.

When he gets up there, it looks exactly as he imagined it. Fluffy clouds, ivory towers behind gates of pearl and gold. At the entrance stands God.

“Hello John,” Says God, “Why not step over here and have a seat.”

John smiles and moves over to the most comfortable chair he’s ever sat in in his life. “Wow” he thinks, “life… my life… is over, yet I’m still here, this is so trippy.”

God smiles and hands John a glass of holy water. “Don’t worry you’re allowed to drink it up here” God says smiling, flipping through Johns file folder.

“Ok so lets see, you killed a lot of things on your time down there.” God pulls out his magical projection cloud, and shows a three dimensional replay of John killing a roach.

John laughs “Oh you can’t be serious, it was just a roach, I killed those things every time I saw one” God frowns. “And how did you benefit from this?” God asks, “You didn’t EAT the roach, the roach wasn’t endangering your life, it wasn’t even a fair fight”

John suddenly looks very confused. “But… it was just a bug, it’s life didn’t have any value, and it’s so ugly, I just didn’t like them in my house”

God gets very upset. “The roach looks the way it looks, because that’s the way I WANTED it to look when I created it. I happen to like the way it looks. And who are you to call the area you reside yours? You should have shown more empathy to creatures smaller than you. the poor things couldn't even beg for their lives.

John looks at God horrified. “But God, I… I believed in you, I read the bible, I went to church, I raised my children in the faith… I… I accepted you into my heart and asked for forgiveness… I was born again and washed in the blood of your son Jesus”

God looks at John, sighing to himself. “John, John…. Those things don’t matter to me. I don’t care if you believe in me, I don’t care what songs you sing, I don’t care about your metaphorical rebirth. All I cared about is that you don’t kill things simply because they bother you.

John is very worried at this point. “Wait wait… I didn’t kill any people… that should count for something right?” God frowns “At least that would have been a fair fight, unless you used a gun or something, but even then, the reason for the murder would have been considered.

John is crying now, totally in grief over his eminent trip to hell.

Just as he is thrown down, everything goes black.

The whole scenario had been in his head; John is still lying on the road, in his last seconds of life imagining the whole thing. When John dies, he doesn’t “go anywhere, he just dies. The neurons in his brain stop firing, blood stops pumping through his veins. He’s just dead, and for the last brief second, he’s grateful for that. Grateful, that no one is in hell for stupid reasons.

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