Christine O’Donnell: Dear God, Change Your Mind

During her short time on the political stage, Christine O’Donnell has generated such incredible buffoonery she could start an “All Christine, All the Time” cable channel. Rupert Murdoch might want to talk to her about it. They seem to be made for each other
– a win/win of biblically crapulent, synergistic proportions.

Almost everything that comes out of Chritine’s mouth is hilarious. Sometimes it’s in a Gracie Allen bubblehead sort of way – “Hey, I
dabbled in the witchcraft. My oh my, silly old me!” Sometimes it’s in a
weird Kids in the Hall
sort of way – “I’ll crrrrush your head and your evil masturbating ways
too!” But, she actually believes some of the gooferous stuff she says
and expects the rest of us to as well.

Her latest political/religious clone of a statement rivals her contention that scientists have developed mice with human brains. After taking her campaign lumps repeatedly, and responded with a series of demonstrably untrue statements or dubious “facts”, she still hasn’t gotten the kind of uncritical, Sharron Angle-style
“leave me alone and don’t embarrass me” coverage she craves – or as
media-savvy Sharron says, “I only want them to ask the questions I want
to answer.”

Bring Out the Big Guy

“OUCH!” It’s time to bring out the Big Guy, personal friend and savior of non-Muslim Tea Partiers and Republicans everywhere.

Christine stopped by the Christian Broadcasting Network to explain why she stays in a political race that is turning her into a laughing

As often happens with religious zealots dressed in right wing, fringe-bedecked vestments, she said God didn’t wanna let her quit. “…you see that if it weren’t for faith, when all logic said it’s time
to quit, we pursued, we marched on, because we knew God was not
releasing us to quit,” she said, referring to herself in the third

Christine, you’d have been better off to stop at logic before playing the God card.

As a young man questioning my own faith, I used to think about the many inconsistencies I saw in religious dogma. For example, if two
football teams prayed before a game to win, how was it possible for one
team to win, the other to lose, and not question how one got
short-changed on their “faith” and fervent prayers that they would win?

My religious betters gave many reasons for this, most of them seeming specious to me.

“Obviously, one team believed more strongly and therefore God granted them their wish,” went one explanation. “God was demonstrating that not
all prayers come true, even if you fervently do your best to make them
happen,” went another. When the answers I got didn’t seem to match the
questions I had, I was often treated to the all-purpose, “God works in
mysterious ways,” explanation.

Of course, there’s nothing wrong with believing there is no contradiction there. There’s nothing wrong with believing you got the
short end of the political coverage stick – even while not considering
the stupid things you’ve said. However, there is something troubling
about blaming illogical decisions on God.

It’s Unfair to God
First, it’s unfair to God to put him in such a tenuous position. He has
enough problems. Second, it gives you a convenient out every time
something doesn’t go your way. “Hey, it wasn’t my fault. I talked to the
Big Guy and he said it was OK for me to fudge my educational background“.
Or, George the Lesser’s penchant for “talking to God” only to be told
everything was hunky dory and he should just keep on keeping on as the
country went to hell around him.

There’s a reason it’s good advice to not mix religion and politics. More often than not, one has nothing – as in Christine’s case – with the
other. It’s also common that biblical explanations often doesn’t hold
much sway with voters, even devoutly religious ones. And when you say
that you talked to God and he told you that it’s perfectly OK to, say,
deprive Muslims
of the same constitutional rights you reserve for yourself, many people
are going to think your celestial cell phone needs some repair.

There is a place for religion in politics, just as there is a place for politics in the pulpit. However, in the middle of a campaign where
your are partially representing yourself as God’s chosen candidate,
you’re out of bounds and it’s unlikely you’ll feel the need to represent
the majority of us who want to keep their politics and religion unmixed
if you are elected.

Let’s just hope God changes his mind.

Cross posted at The Omnipotent Poobah Speaks!

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Comment by Jim DePaulo on September 30, 2010 at 12:37pm
Ah yes, the witchy ways of Christine; a contender for the Queen of Stupid against the veterans Sarah "Grizzly Mama" Palin and Michelle "Dumb as Dirt" Bachmann. Are these three the idea of the perfect Teapublican woman?
Any parody of them would, most likely, be a quintessential example of Poe's Law, "Without a winking smiley or other blatant display of humor, it is impossible to create a parody of Fundamentalism that SOMEONE won't mistake for the real thing."



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