I have to admit, since I have returned to atheism the benefits have been seemingly lacking. My first spill into atheism gave my anxiety about Hell a big break. As a child I constantly worried if I was "really saved" or if I somehow lost my salvation. When I was "borned again" at the age of 16 I did not completely resume my fear of Hell because I believed that as long as I felt a personal connection to God that I was still safe to assume I was saved. Now I am an atheist again, and I often wonder if I am truly better off this way.


I was talking to a Christian friend of mine who reminded me of some of the cons of my old beliefs. At first I was confessing some of my personal cons about atheism including confusion about morality, purpose in life and the bleakness of rejecting the concept of the afterlife. I have been very confused about morality and purpose in life due to my recent decision to accept moral nihilism as the only intellectually honest worldview. And needless to say, the idea that nothing happens when we die is not necessarily the most comforting belief in the world to have.


But my friend remind me of some of the struggles I once faced as a Christian that are now no longer problems including guilt, contradictory teachings in churches and the problems with the meaning of life that Christianity brings. As a morally nihilistic atheist, pretty much stuff like masturbation and whatever are guilt-free, so long as I personally prefer to view it that way. Of course I still think certain things are wrong and perhaps even "evil" but it's only because I chose to have that preference. And all those religious contradictions that gave me so much grief no longer bother me, well, because I see The Bible as an ancient book of myths. And if all we did in life was prepare for Heaven, then what is the purpose of life here on Earth? Instead I am free to create my own purpose, and focus on what is actually going on now instead of what a 2 thousand year old doomsday prophecy is supposedly telling us.


Of course the reason I accept atheism and moral nihilism is because I see both as logical conclusions. But if I am going to accept these "belief systems," I might as well learn to enjoy whatever benefits they may bring while I am at it.

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