"I miss the good old days. You know, when things were simpler and more pure. Like Mayberry."

This is probably one of the most absolutely ridiculous notions in America today. Seriously. What makes it worse would be the fact that everyone wants things to be like Mayberry. They wish for Mayberry whenever they hear news about legislation that favors quicker immigration is being considered. They cry for Mayberry's Christian family values whenever they hear yet another state is willing to acknowledge and offer benefits to married gay couples.

Even politicians use the good ole times excuse when passing discriminating legislation. Take Asa Hutchinson, governor of Arkansas for example. He was just about to sign into law one of those Religious Restoration Acts, and after seeing the backlash in Indiana, has become nervous about what he is about to do, deciding to send the legislation back for revision instead. His public statement? "....in ordinary times this bill would not be controversial, but these are not ordinary times."

Which basically is saying,"Why can't we be in Mayberry again?"

I hate to break it to you, but the circumstances of Mayberry never existed in America. Never, ever. Never, ever, never, ever, ever, EVER. People see that 1960's family show and treat it like an honest representation of the all American family. God, common sense, and small government. This governor I was mentioning grew up watching the show, and others with similar themes. He doesn't understand that Mayberry, while set in the 60's expanding economy, was based on the simpler times of the 1930's. There was a desire for nostalgia to be brought into the show, and that is why folk music, church, and focus on family were incorporated.

So, what? Then let's go back to the 30's then. They were good times, right?

You tell me.

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The only thing good about the 1930's was the increased desire for simple living, and that's mostly because they didn't have a choice back then. With the desire for simple living came an increased demand for folk music and art. Jobs were scarce thanks to the Depression. Add the agricultural disasters like the Dust Bowl on top of it? Food was scarce too. Tradition became king during that decade before WWII broke out, and so did a tough as nails attitude when faced with desperation to survive. Mayberry never bothered with any of that. It had the lush economy of the 1960's story setting to keep the ugly struggles of the Depression away.

The Andy Griffith Show was brilliant in its almost seamless meshing of our cultural past with the modern reality of the 1960's. Writers of the show used the traditions of the past and the modern conveniences of the future to show an ideal situation for us all to admire and look toward for our own lives. But in reality, it was an illusion. It was used to cushion the depressing news of Vietnam's bloody loss of lives. It was an escape from the torrid television coverage of news coverage of the draft, desegregation, and outright riots in the streets at major university campuses.

Mayberry never truly existed in our history. The good ole days, depending on which generation you look to, never had it as good as Mayberry. The entire purpose of the Andy Griffith Show wasn't to highlight reality. It hid the ugly racism that demanded blacks sit at the back of the bus. The show didn't touch on sexual revolution that was occurring in America of the 60's, preferring to focus on what would be seen as wholesome and Christian like in nature. And that is what a television show is supposed to do. Provide a feel good atmosphere to distract its viewers from the harsh reality of the world around them for a little while.

I doubt the writers ever intended for its young audience to actually twist their story into an unconscious remembrance of actual time and place though, but that is what has happened. Certainly the producers never intended for their little imagined town of impossibility to become an actual goal for modern society. It just won't work.

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Yet, that is what many who long for the good ole days want. They want modern convenience, traditions of the past, and all the issues of the world to magically go away and just follow their desired story line. Keep things simple by making everyone follow the same structure of reality. If you don't want to play along, go away and be quiet so everyone else can be comfortable. If you don't be quiet, then they'll legislate you away. These ultra conservatives refuse to accept Mayberry's perfect store fronts, comical barber, and admired sheriff as the illusion they truly were. Much like their bibles, conservative Christians cling to the idea that simpler times are a panacea for all the sin in the world. That in a Mayberry setting, who can say no to God? After all, there is less temptation, less opportunity wander off the divine path to Heaven.

And if everyone is godly, then society will automatically improve. This is something that Mayberry never ever even remotely insisted upon.

Ironically, Mayberry has several characters that never quite fit in. Even more ironic is that, despite not fitting in, or even truly conforming, one character really did have a positive impact on the town. I think you all know who I am referring to in particular.

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Yes, Ernest T. Bass is who I'm talking about. Deputy Fife saw him as a nut. Myself? Ernest was an innovator. He showed ingenuity, determination, a knack for making people think outside their own interest. He even managed to garner support from Sheriff Taylor himself. All the while he completely clashed with the fundamental principles the town operated on. And he wasn't the only one that showed doubt about the moral reasoning of his fellow townsfolk. I particularly enjoyed an episode where Barney and Andy get into a bit of a debate about psychic phenomena.

Again, there is wiggle room, and even a willingness to understand where the other is coming from, as you see Andy completely indulge Barney's agnosticism about Aladdin's Lamp. While this particular scene is meant to be humorous, it shows a willingness to meet in the middle, and at least discuss why a person feels a certain way. On top of that, you also see it is okay to just agree to disagree. This is how society has to work in order to succeed. How all these truly wonderful examples of functioning society have been blatantly ignored in favor of an impossible one size fits all lifestyle is beyond me.

Many evangelicals are simply banding together because they share a common belief structure, with little care of how crude and divisive their behavior is to the society around them. They are removed from the rest of America's citizenry. Rather being pit against the entire world than be willing to compromise, this mentality will cost them dearly in the future. Someone needs to effectively demonstrate that strength isn't necessarily in just numbers anymore, but in that of overall unity. Being contrary simply because of cultural differences is both foolish and costly for our future.

Will they ultimately decide to leave our shores and found their own country like the Pilgrims or Puritans? I hope not. The Pilgrims at first found England too corrupt, so they left to Holland. In Holland, their children were assimilating to Dutch culture, and they found that unacceptable and then left again, this time to America. The Puritans left England and started over in America later. What happened once in America? They started to divide against each other, and formed their own separate churches. You had witch trials. Heresy charges. Adultery? Capital charges that could get you jail time, public whipping and more.

The bottom line here is that Christianity has to quit running away from the world and consider picking up a few lessons from other cultures. This doctrine, and its leaders, obviously can't handle it out there on their own, constantly running away from problems or insisting everyone else must conform to their standards. It's time for them to make reasonable accommodation for the world around them, not the other way around.

There isn't a land large enough or a television show's interpretation well written enough to give these zealots the perfect Christian theocracy they desire. They are the authors of their own destruction, even when on their own with only the same ilk around them.

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Comment by jay H on April 5, 2015 at 5:01pm

I'm old enough to remember when it was new, and I don't think Andy Griffith was ever meant to be anything other than a fairy tale. It was excapism then. Despite Barney's bumbling with guns, no one ever got shot, there was never any real crime, even in 1963 (which is the era in which the show was set, not the 30s) it was far from realistic--it was corny then, intentionally. People liked it because it was escape from the headlines.

Funny that now, people are taking it too seriously.

Comment by Michael Penn on April 4, 2015 at 1:57pm

Your first B/W picture of the couple and a child all in rocking chairs listening to the radio reminds me of our entertainment on Friday or Saturday night when I was a child and living with my grandparents. The old battery radio had to last us a month on one battery. It was about the size of a battery in todays riding lawnmowers and cost about $5. The radio itself had an outside antenna if you lived out of the city. If the battery got low you could go outside at the antenna base and pour water on the ground and actually make the signal stronger. In those days our Saturday night entertainment was WSM in Nashville, TN and we listened to the Grand Ole Opry.

So much for my redneck hick Ozark roots. Who would ever think that I would be married 3 times and one of my wives would be a black tribal lady from Kenya and half my age? Not so long ago I complimented a 34 year old and she said that I need to get over myself.

Comment by Bluegrass Skeptic on April 3, 2015 at 9:16pm

Ted, I could never imagine what it must be like to experience that kind of hatred. Wow!

Television revised history in the minds of millions of children back in the 50s and 60s, and now they run our government....scary.

Comment by Michael Penn on April 3, 2015 at 7:17pm

When I was a kid we lived out in the sticks about 10 miles or more from town. The little town is 1,642 people today but when I was a young boy the sheriff would help me across the street. He was very visible and well liked in the town.

The bad thing about those days is that nobody really knew anything. There were teachers and encyclopedias, etc. but no quick way to verify anything. This made a lot of knowledge similar to folklore. Maybe this is why these little communities believed in god and the bible. Maybe this is why so many today and backwards and confused because this might be what they want to go back to. TV was new and radio passed the news along rather poorly.

Comment by Loren Miller on April 3, 2015 at 9:39am

Stay right here 'cause these are the good old days. [emphasis mine]
-- Carly Simon

Succinct and to the point, from where I sit.

Comment by Ted Foureagles on April 3, 2015 at 9:20am

Nice piece -- thanks!  I spent much of my youth in a little North Carolina town that was about as close to Mayberry as you'll get.  We had a cross burned on our lawn.


Comment by Dyslexic's DOG on April 3, 2015 at 1:26am

Simple times and less pollutants, though it was those times that most people were being poisoned by asbestos, polishes, dies, cosmetics, etc.... because nobody was aware of the dangers.

Now we are so aware that people have anxiety attacks when they discover their house has asbestos in it.



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