ideology and religion shit list

• 7th day adventist shit happens on saturdays.
• agnostic #1: did someone shit?
• agnostic #2: what is this shit?
• agnostic #3: shit might have happened; then again, maybe not.
• agnosticism what is this shit?
• altruism want some shit?
• amish shit dost occur.
• apathism i don't give a shit.
• atheism #1: i can't believe this shit!
• atheism #2: i don't believe this shit
• atheism#3: what shit?
• ba'hai all shit is truly shit.
• baptist fundamentalism shit happens because the bible says so.
• buddhism if shit happens, it isn't really shit.
• buddhism shit happens.
• calvinism: shit happens because you don't work.
• capitalism how much will this shit cost?
• capitalism: that's my shit.
• cartesianism i shit, therefore i am.
• catholicism if shit happens, you deserve it.
• chauvinism: we may be shit, but you can't live without us...
• christian science #2: shit happening is all in your mind.
• christian science: when shit happens, don't call a doctor - pray!
• church of subgenius: bob shits.
• classical marxism the workers take all the shit, but they're gonna dish it back out again.
• commercialism: let's package this shit.
• communism: it's everybody's shit.
• confucianism: confucius say, "shit happens."
• congregationalist: shit that happens to one person is just as good as shit that happens to another.
• contract theory if we don't agree to form society, everything will go to shit.
• creation science we have proof that god created all the shit that happens.
• creationism: god made all shit.
• dadism your mom knows her shit.
• darwinism we came up from shit.
• darwinism: this shit was once food.
• descartes i shit therefore i am.
• dianetics shit your way to a better life.
• discordian #1: who gives a shit?
• discordianism this might be shit, but is instead a fuzzy 1955 mustang.
• dominicans belive in shit, or we'll boil you in it.
• dyslexianism hits shapnep.
• episcopalian: it's not so bad if shit happens, as long as you serve the right wine with it.
• existentialism #2: what is shit, anyway?
• existentialism: shit doesn't happen; shit is.
• feminism: men are shit.
• fundamentalism #2: if shit happens to a televangelist, it's okay.
• fundamentalism #3: shit must be born again.
• fundamentalism: if shit happens, you will go to hell, unless you are born again. (amen!)
• hare krishna shit happens rama rama ding ding.
• hare krishna: shit happens, rama rama.
• hedonism: there is nothing like a good shit happening!
• hinduism this shit happened before.
• idolism: let's bronze this shit.
• impressionism: from a distance, shit looks like a garden.
• islam #2: if shit happens, kill the person responsible.
• islam #3: if shit happens, blame israel.
• islam if shit happens, it is the will of allah.
• islam if shit happens, take a hostage.
• islam: if shit happens, it is the will of allah.
• jehovah's witness knock, knock, "shit happens."
• jehovah's witnesses #2: may we have a moment of your time to show you some of our shit?
• jehovah's witnesses #3: shit has been prophesied and is imminent; only the righteous shall survive its happening.
• jehovah's witnesses: >knock< >knock< shit happens.
• judaism why does this shit always happen to us?
• judaism: why does this shit always happen to us?
• logical-positivism shit = s+h+i+t
• lutheran: if shit happens, don't talk about it.
• marines it's not just shit, it's an adventure.
• mccarthyism are you now, or have you ever been, shit?
• mennonite none of this modern shit now.
• methodist: it's not so bad if shit happens, as long as you serve grape juice with it.
• momism you'll eat this shit and like it!
• moonies: only really happy shit happens.
• mormon shit happens again & again & again.
• mormonism #2: this shit is going to happen again.
• mormonism your shit is shit, but our shit is the one true shit.
• mormonism: god sent us this shit.
• murphism shit always happens at the worst possible time and place.
• narcissism my shit don't stink.
• nietsche if you're not ubermenschen, you're not shit.
• nihilism everything is shit.
• nihilism: no shit.
• nixonism shit didn't happen, and if it did, i don't know anything about it.
• nonsequiturism route 176 goes south.
• objectivism (ann rand) shit is shit.
• paganism shit happens. and is a part of nature.
• panglossism this is the best of all possible shits.
• platonism there is an ideal shit, of which all the shit that happens is but an imperfect image.
• practical: deal with shit one day at a time.
• presbyterian: this shit was bound to happen.
• protestantism let shit happen to someone else.
• protestantism shit won't happen if i work harder.
• protestantism: let shit happen to someone else.
• quakers: let us not fight over this shit.
• rastafarian shit happens, but if it's all right with jah, it's all right with me.
• rastafarianism: let's smoke this shit!
• robinism (tv) holy shit batman!
• russeau only natural shit is worth shit.
• satanism: sneppah tihs.
• scientific-creationism shit happens all at once
• scientology: if shit happens, see "dianetics", p.157.
• secular humanism: shit evolves.
• secular-humanism shit happens, but there's a rational explanation.
• seventh day adventism: no shit shall happen on saturday.
• shinto shit is everywhere. so as long as you're stepping in it, show it some respect.
• skinnerism if eat then shit.
• solipsism all this shit is a creation of my imagination.
• solipsism the only thing i can be sure of is that my shit happens.
• spoonerism hit shappens.
• stalinism the state treats you like shit.
• stoicism: this shit is good for me.
• subgenius: bob happens -- so give me some slack!
• surrealism shit is shiny and shaped like a buick.
• taoism shit happens
• taoism the shit that happens is not the true shit.
• taoism: shit happens.
• the-force do not be swayed by the dark side of the shit.
• tv-evangelism you need our shit, but it'll cost you.
• unitarian what is this shit?
• unitarian: shit that happens to one person is just as bad as shit that happens to another.
• unitarianism there's only one shit, but you can have it happen any way you want.
• unitarianism: come let us reason together about this shit.
• utilitarianism do that which generates the greatest shit for the greatest number.
• utopianism: this shit does not stink.
• vandalism i'm gonna wreck this shit!
• voodooism shit doesn't just happen - somebody dumped it on you
• wiccan: an it harm none, let shit happen.
• xeno's paradox it's logically impossible for shit to happen.
• yuppieism it's my shit! all mine!
• zen buddhism #2: what is the sound of shit happening?
• zen buddhism: shit is, and is not.
• zen what is the sound of shit happening?
• zoroastrianism: shit happens half on the time.

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