So as I sit here with tears streaming down my face I am tempted to pray...a friend hits me up on facebook and says I need to "return to church to seek god because he is our help". My mom says my life sucks because god is missing from it. I was in a bad car accident on saturday night and that complicates my life....not sure if I even believe in relationships anymore...not sure about much of anything and am looking for inspiration that doesn't come from the bible....What to do??

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Comment by Kimberlee Williams on August 13, 2011 at 9:20pm
Yes, Wanderer...I feel as if I have a family here.  I love you guys!!!  I hope that I can get to know you all even more....thanks again.
Comment by Jedi Wanderer on August 12, 2011 at 7:48pm
Yay Kimberlee! You're very welcome for whatever help I may have been. You know a lot of us have had to come here to find people who actually get it, it can be very lonely out there in the real world. I think of this place as sort of my home away from home, somewhere I can go to just talk to people who can actually see the way things really are and have realistic answers to real problems. I hope you can find us as something of the same!
Comment by Kimberlee Williams on August 12, 2011 at 3:18pm
booklover, wanderer, l.hunter and dakota...thank you so much for your words of comfort and wisdom.  You are all so right.  I do have inner strength and I can continue to stand for what I believe, even in the face of adversity and struggle.  All of a sudden I don't feel so alone.  Thank you so much!!
Comment by Dakota Marquette on August 11, 2011 at 7:44am
I suggest that u just take it slow and look at ur current situation. Your friends advice to return to "god" and ur mothers assunption of "god" being necessary to block these types of things from happening, are expected. They. Are believers. U r not, so u can listen; but remember your stance on the subject and thank them for their input. Like L.Hunter said, u must find your own inner strength, calm and clarity. Only then will u know exactly what to do. I sure hope, that u do find it and ease ur struggles. :)
Comment by L.Hunter on August 11, 2011 at 4:44am
Leaving faith and our social relationships is extremely hard for the reasons that you and many others are experiencing. Leaving faith leaves us lonely, alone and frustrated. We face the same obstacles that theists face. However many times we do it alone, without the comfort of family and loved ones shoulders to cry and lean on. Will it get better? we sure hope so. Do you have untapped strength and courage to face the day without believing in an imaginary friend? I think all humans do. You've already made one of the bravest stances one can take in life, take that strength and apply it to this and every other obstacle you face from now on.
Comment by Jedi Wanderer on August 11, 2011 at 1:55am

I'm a lot better at the providing reasons for a belief thing rather than the inspiring people with words thing, but I can at least tell the difference when each is needed! You clearly are looking for, well, as you say, inspiration, the motivation to go on doing what it is you do. I know its a lot harder to find it when your "life sucks", and how do you know just what to say to someone like that in harder-than-usual times, especially when you don't know anything about her (except that you were... some type of Christian I'm guessing)? Hmmm...


Well I'll tell you like this: I was raised Jewish and, to make a very long story very short, I no longer have relationships with virtually any of my family (those that I do are kept at a very long distance, where they belong). It is exceedingly difficult to make a break with one's past, especially when that past has sucked the wind out of you so that you haven't got much to motivate you to begin with. But, as the old saying goes, and I am beginning to think it might be true, if you stick with something, it will work out in the end. It took me a long time to get where I am, and though there is still much work to be done, maybe more than I ever can do, I really think I can be happy in this world. Relinquishing religion was never a problem for me, but still, not having people in my life that I expected (wrongly, as it turns out) would be there for me was infinitely harder. Its not religion that's missing from your life, its the social relationships we all thrive on that's missing, and so naturally, you are not thriving. You are obviously a step above others in the character department (that goes for almost everyone I've met here), so don't let the worries of lesser minds drive you to do something really incredibly stupid (like talking to people who don't exist!). Focus on your social and personal problems, because really, aren't the personal and social problems enough? Look, I don't know what the perfect thing to say is here, what will make you pick up your chin and swell your chest and set your heart back in motion, I won't give you the usual platitudes like "I know you can do it, because really, how could I know that? Maybe you won't ever be okay, who am I to say? But as for what to do when you are in these situations, that's an easy one. Has anyone ever gotten anywhere by giving up, losing hope? You simply need to find that inner strength to try your best, to make the best of things. Otherwise it is clear that you will only increase the chances that you will suffer. And don't turn to the false hope of religion. What could you gain by giving up your convictions and losing your integrity?

Comment by Kimberlee Williams on August 10, 2011 at 6:44pm
Thank you all soooo much.  Before now, I felt so alone in all of this (especially without "god"). I appreciate all of your kind words and your suggestions.  I will give them a whirl.  Going to the lawyers tomorrow to see if we have a case.  We will see.
Comment by Kim D on August 10, 2011 at 11:41am
Kim, it's going to be okay. You can allow yourself to grieve and worry for a little while and then move past it and start thinking about how to fix things, step-by-step. It's okay to meditate, think and do a little self-talk. Consult with somebody about the car accident and maybe talk to somebody about your feelings of hurt regarding relationships. It may not seem like it now, but it's going to work out one way or another. You're not alone in the feelings you are experiencing. We've all been there probably more than once and you're going to get past this in time. Promise.

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