New company to rescue left-behind pets after the Rapture

A new company has started up - a company that will rescue and care for pets once their owners are Raptured away. Christians, take note - this is no joke. Just as it says on the official Eternal Earth-Bound Pets, USA Web site, this is serious.

Have you ever wondered who will care for your pets once you are joined with your maker in Heaven? Well, now you can put your mind at ease. For a small fee, you can rest easy knowing that the fine folks at Eternal Earth-Bound Pets will rescue and care for your pets once you're gone.

They are currently operating in 20 states. According to their Web site, they will care for "dogs, cats, birds, rabbits, and small caged mammals." Oddly enough they do not offer this service for camels. Why do I say "oddly enough" in regard to camels?

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Comment by Trina Hoaks on August 28, 2009 at 10:02pm
He fully admits that the idea came from another site from across the pond. That is no secret.

Nothing like some good ole canned camel spam to start the day.
Comment by Jim DePaulo on August 28, 2009 at 9:27pm
It's still a good scam and would probably work with the reality challenged, rapture ready; after all y'al don't wanta leave a good ole coon dawg without seein' t' his feedin and such.
Comment by Laura Largent on August 28, 2009 at 3:48pm
I love the idea. The stupid pour all their money into the collection plate every week, why not get some for yourself. They could use the money to help animal shelters or something... Seriously though, anyone who gives money to that company should be quaranteened.
Comment by Greywolf on August 28, 2009 at 3:31pm
I believe it was anthropologist, Margaret Mead, who said, "All it takes is one person".
Comment by Trina Hoaks on August 28, 2009 at 2:46pm
Greywolf, we can always try.
Comment by Greywolf on August 28, 2009 at 1:40pm
Only people of principle would never stoop as low as to prey upon the stupid.

Except for Marinette County, Wisconsin, Trina. It's a place no atheist on earth would want to endure considering the present "administration"--especially the isolated and remotely located non-theist with no one and nowhere to turn to! Though convincing anyone that's true would almost constitute a genuine "miracle".
Comment by Trina Hoaks on August 28, 2009 at 11:09am
Yes, Greywolf - atheists and pets shall inherit the earth. :) Sounds like a nice place to be.
Comment by Jim DePaulo on August 28, 2009 at 10:21am
Actually this is a great scam. You would be selling to the most gullible people on the planet and the chances you would have to actually do anything would be less than zero - how could you miss?
Stupid can be expensive.
Comment by Greywolf on August 28, 2009 at 2:07am
What? The pets don't get to join their beloved owners in Paradise?! Well what the Hell kind of Here After could it possibly be if it refuses pets? They suffer right along with us, don't they?

Now what kind of nincompoop would run a Here After that keeps loving owners and pets estranged from each other? It wouldn't be that "God" creature so many people are talking about nowadays, would it?

I'd rather stay with the pets. Wouldn't you? Who would want to spend all of eternity a bowin' and a scrapin' and worshipin' and adorin' an infinitely vain deity's insatiable craving for adoration anyway? And that doesn't even include the countless hours of singin' in Gregorian Chant while a grovelin' involved!

Surprised that His Almightiness doesn't have the insects and sea creatures worshipping and adoring him too. (Ooops. Perhaps He and his Son, God will get around to that later today.)

None for me, thanks.



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