No, seriously. I'm not. Not Ever. The FBI told me I'd be jailed as a terrorist if I attempted stand-up comedy. Because I'd bomb so bad. I'd be a human bomb. Like a suicide bomber, but comedic in intent instead of socio-political.
I'm not often bothered by it. I'd never publicly whine about it. I may have no ability at giving "teh" humor, but I can still LOL and :-) with the best of them.
I'd only lament it if my balls were being burned off with hot pokers because I had failed to make my captors laugh.
I'm abysmal at jokes.
You know what they call an alternative medicine that's been proven to work?
Like, for instance, a millenia old herbal supplement derived from salicylate-rich plants (like certain species from the genus Salix) but that's now used commonly as an analgesic, antipyretic, and/or anti-inflammatory?
Absolute shit, that.
I'm not funny.
Sometimes when I'm crying about it, alone in my dark room with black painted walls and posters of Bauhaus and Dashboard Confessional covering the walls, I just wish my mascara would stop running; and I have to stop masturbating long enough to take my medicine or I'll have an "attack" again.
Not being funny is stupid.