Ok, im an atheist, i'll admit it here, and around my mom and dad all the time...especially my dad, just to make him mad because hes a christian and likes to try and force me to believe and crap. He believes that no different race hould be together and that gays should all drop dead or whatever. So, the more i piss him off the better. Im not saying im an atheist because of that though, im an atheist because i just don't see proof of a man upstairs saying hey, do this or do that, plus we are told as little kids and stuff when we say something like "Michael broke the mirror, not me" "Wheres the proof honey?". I might pull a George Carlin and be a sun believer, its there, i know what it does for me and i can always count on it to shine bright on me everyday. Though there is one group of people i still haven't gotten the courage to say "Hey, i don't believe in this god of yours, im an atheist and proud of it" and that is my grandmas side of the family. We have a family get together (they call it a renuion, but if its every year, there is no time to miss each other), and they like to pray, sing, and talk about how god has saved them and gotten them here safely, i just want to yell out "God didn't do that, you did! You drove the car with your own body, gas, brake and got yourself here without anyones help, so stop saying that!" but i lack the courage to admit to them that i don't believe in their god.

I know its not right to just let them think im a christian like them still and im happy with it, because im not. But, I can't break it to them, they are always their for me and they are proud of me for what i accomplish, even if its a small thing. What if i tell them, they decided to just say whatever to me and not care anymore? I don't know, this might be the year i try to say, "Hey, im an atheist! I have my reasons, so don't try to convert me back." But, we will see if that is possible for me to do this year...

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Comment by Timothy Warner on March 14, 2011 at 4:25pm

Well, i told my grandma (before she past away) but its her family that im worry about. They still think im christian and believe such things, but im just getting tire of all the praying and let god bless you stuff. Im really tempted to tell them, it annoys me way too much to be around them and not telling them the truth. Im a nice guy, i hate lying to people, so i have decided, in july for our family renuion, im just going to tell them. If it hurts them so badly that they just say whatever to me, then i will just accept their views over me, but make sure to let them know i will never disrespect them because what they believe or anything like that and im still the same person, just with a different view.


Thanks for all your comments, it helping me think alittle better. Thanks alot everyone.

Comment by Rosemary LYNDALL WEMM on March 14, 2011 at 12:06pm

Keep the peace until you are old enough to be independant.   It's pragmatic.  Don't beat yourself up for it.  Being perfectly honest about absolutely everything is actually not a good policy. 

When you are comfortable and self-assured then you tell them, in a low key fashion that does not seek to throw things in their face or belittle the love and care that your family provides for you.  Perhaps something like: "I know this is important to you, grandma, and that it feels right and good to you, but it stopped making sense to me a long time ago.  Do you think you could respect my opinions on this matter, too?"

Comment by Rob van Senten on March 14, 2011 at 11:27am

What if i tell them, they decided to just say whatever to me and not care anymore?


That would seem to be possible only if they don't care about who you are. If they only care about what you are, being a Christian that follows their specific interpretation of certain scripture(s) then how much do they really care about "who" you are?


So, the only thing you have to lose is people that never were attached to you in the first place. One of the biggest issues when coming out atheist is that it shows you how easily people that supposedly love you are shown to be frauds that couldn't care less. 


It happens often that families create a little space for other family members to occupy, when people attempt to create their own little space they are ostracized. It leaves you with the choice to either be who you are, or to become what you are not, for the sake of others.


It's really an easy choice if you'd ask me. The consequences can still suck though.


Coming out atheist might just tell you whom in your family care about you and who do not. Are you prepared for a valuable, yet possibly quite painful lesson about life/humans?

Comment by Grace Fitzpatrick on March 14, 2011 at 9:37am
I have family I haven't told either.  They are elderly and it makes them feel nice to think I still believe like they do.  I don't think anyone will judge you for not wanting to tell your grandma. Good luck with whatever you decide to do.
Comment by Jedi Wanderer on March 13, 2011 at 8:27pm
Wow, good story. Its pretty tough to come out to people about anything when you know they just won't understand it, and because its your family and you care about them and all that it makes it way harder. I wouldn't even tell you that you HAVE to do it, that you have to be honest with them or anything, because you've got reasons for telling them and reasons for not, so whatever way you decide is understandable. Just do whatever makes you the most comfortable. But if you do tell them, please, let us know how it went down!

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