when green the grass did grow

around the fumbles of desire

i followed my own footprints

up my mountain seeking...higher

looking with my eyes i found

myself too quickly blind

looking past my eyes

into the hollow of my mind

i fell forward in a graceful swan

into my private fire

i pulled myself aright and

stumbled backwards into grief

i grumbled like a madman,

i tumbled like a leaf

i spent my seed

in spurts of song

and fainting fast

into a long

and hopeless,

dreamless sleep:

i found relief

and now i lay

a vegetable

upon god’s

cutting table

a phallic,

inert cucumber

…too soon...

too soon unable

to bleed my heart

into a bowl

to eat my flesh

to feed my soul

to grind my life

down to a role:

a neon

aesop’s fable

i long to fly

a phoenix flight

across the mountains

of the night

to grow myself

back to the womb

to cheat the devil,

beat the tomb

to raise a new sun

all my own

to stand upon

green earth alone

and if i die,

may god be damned

but if i live,

to live a man