Enough is enough! 

There has been way too much silliness and name-calling on Nexus lately. People are joining groups they disagree with simply to argue with group members. Others are stalking and chasing members around the site simply to harass them. Thin-skinned or not, this has caused visits to Nexus to be a chore for many, and a few have left the site. 

The only qualification to be a member of Nexus is to be a nontheist. Other than that we are a community. Civil debate is welcome in the forum, but should not be tolerated in individual groups (unless this is the purpose of the group), and on member pages.

If you are unsure what is acceptable behavior, check out the Site Rules. If you are having a problem or you notice anyone violating the rules, please use the "Report an Issue" link at the bottom of every page. 

Finally, I am seriously considering adding the title of the below Phil Plait speech to our rules.

Click to open video in a separate window: Don't Be A Dick

What do you think? Good idea or not? I am interested in any feedback and open to solutions. I'm not looking for complaints.

Be forewarned that NO member names will be allowed in comments.

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Replies to This Discussion

Richard thank you for addressing this issue. Stalking and chasing people around is not a form of building community. There are going to be many people who disagree on style and content. That's just life.

Live and let live should be somewhere in the rules, but don't be a dick is probably just as good. Unless that's sexist, then maybe it should be don't be a jerk (that was an attempt at humor).
For a group that is constantly accused of having no morals, we should be particularly sensitive to how we behave towards others. We consider ourselves "more evolved" and "enlightened" and able to see through the bullshlt? Let's demonstrate that fact with our actions and words.
Perhaps we could have groups where (clean, civil, and spirited) debate is welcome and encouraged and other groups where people share their own ideas, opinions, and experiences without countering or invaliding other posters?

I joined AtheistNexus because I was tired of being in the extreme minority and having everything attributed to religion. I don't want to take away from people who want to vent, but I think there's room here for everyone.
This kind of debate forum is in the works. However, I have put it on hold until we get this mess under control.
The Brights forum has a section called "The Asylum" where anything goes -- I mean anything. While the forum as a whole is uncensored, if trolls start trouble or abusive threads are posted, they get moved to The Asylum where they can fester for the entertainment (schadenfreude?) of more rational onlookers.
I have to agree with John (again). I was there in the audience when Phil made his speech, and I think that works for Phil, but not everyone.

I'm not an apologist, and not all ideas are equal with others. When a member starts spouting off nonsense, I have no problem telling them that they need to post where the information came from and I have no problem with tearing the nonsense apart if it is bogus, has no proof, isn't something that has critical thinking behind it (That is exactly why I started the group No Nonsense).

I've seen many members get defensive and act as if I am attacking them, when I am only attacking their words and ideas. If you can't handle someone dissecting your beliefs, you may as well be a theist. I can't stand whining. If you do not like someone or that person hurt your feelings, stay away from them or ignore them. Time and Time again I've seen members whine about someone who has torn apart the idea, but has not said one word about the person, and they cry about how they were attacked. Some of us are kinder than others when it comes to stupidity, that does not mean one way is correct. As long as the person in question is not being attacked, and it is outside of the specific group for that idea, it's fair game. Grow up, not everyone is going to agree with you or coddle you. Get a thicker skin.

Stalking is inexcusable, don't go to the specific groups that have ideas you disagree with.

Funk Q:
Bickerrhea (Groganism) should have no place in a forum dedicated to reason, science and fun.

first of all, names are not to be mentioned here. Secondly, I don't see his way as bickering. I almost always agree with and publicly back him, and I have no problem what so ever with his way (I will, however gladly speak up if I disagree with him). He is straightforward and direct and does not stay silent when he sees ridiculous beliefs, and illogical thinking, and self-absorbed rude behaviour.

He will spend an exorbitant amount of time checking and rechecking his sources, and makes sure that there are no holes in his argument. His posts are clear, well researched, and interesting and it makes for a great discussion. I wish more members were like him.

He also does not tolerate inappropriate posting, I know a lot of members have been angry at him for speaking up about where to post what, and to ask people to look and see if the subject is already being discussed, so that there are not duplicate posts. He points out the rules here, and he makes sure that his posts are in the correct place, are not spam, are not duplicates, etc.

I think everyone should use his posting guidelines flowchart. It is really all about common courtesy, but so many people lack even a minimum amount of that. This would be a spectacular site if everyone was as meticulous as he. There aren't a lot of moderators here. There needs to be more of a member voice when etiquette is not upheld. Speak up and do not tolerate it. I speak up when I see no regard for others or for the rules, and there are a few of us who do. I also speak up and back members who have been targeted without warrant.
Perhaps if there were more who did not keep silent because they are afraid of hurting someone's feelings, things would be better, and everyone would stop whining about you-know-who.

This is a discussion EVERYONE should read.
Do I have to clarify that I like Funk Q and I am not attacking him, but only disagreeing with something he has posted?

That is what some members want, and I have no time to coddle children.

If Funk Q needed me to clarify something, I would, but I think he knows that I am not attacking him, that there is a big difference between that and disagreeing with something that has been said. Plus I am confident that Funk Q would tell me to fuck off if I were to attack him personally, and not cry about it, and tell everyone that I am a big meanie and that I hurt his feelings, or go to every discussion I post to tell everyone how terrible and hateful I am. boo fucking hoo
I didn't delete my comment, someone else did. Dismaying, as it was a neutral comment meant to clarify. I knew this because I remember the discussion where neologisms were being created, and felch created (or repeated) the term bickerrhea in a list of similar terms.

No, you didn't need to clarify that you like funk Q, not to me.
Fred, this is not that big of an issue, and there's no need to read between the lines.

Moderators shouldn't get special treatment. If they fan the flames or write stupid things, their/my comments should be treated the same as other site members.
For the record, I deleted the comment and the one made by someone else. Both mentioned a member's name. As I stated in my intro, that was a no no. I understand both were meant to clarify, but they still named specific names.
Okey doke. Sorry about that.
@Funk Q: As humorous as your comment may be, it speaks to the core of the issue.

Nexus is not just a place for the forum pros, and people who spew craziness. We have several members who are casual participants and want to use Nexus as they do Facebook. Instead of fighting back, they simply leave. On rare occasions, they'll send me an email or approach me at a convention and say something like, "Hey, nice site. But I have enough stress at work. This place is not for me."




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